Rental car hell.

So as part of my self-inflicted trigger finger wish lift, I decided a while back to go to Germany. The Black Forest to be exact. I was aching for someplace with pine trees and cool breezes to escape the heat of Spain and calm my mind before going back to the US.

So I decided on the famous spa town called Baden Baden in the Black Forest. In addition to that turns out that less than an hour away from Baden Baden was another town called “Bad Wildebad” that low and behold had a  stair race happening. Yea! Another race to add to my belt and a reason to get off my ass and train. Ill write about that soon.

We planned to arrive at noon, with plenty of time to get in some hiking and go to one of the famous Roman baths in Baden Baden. Great plans are made and great plans are made to be broken.

So on arrival in the tiny tiny  Baden Baden airport, ( it’s fitting isn’t it? The town has two names why not add two tinies to its airport?) We disembarked on the tarmac on Ryan Air. It was cool enough for a jacket and there was what looked like an old plane hanger next to the airport that looked like it was from the war. I immediately felt like I was in Germany for some reason despite my lack of historical knowledge.

We arrived at noon and I assumed we would be at the car rental place in a flash and we would be off and running with a full day to enjoy the place.

I was wrong.

The airport was the size of an anthill, and no rental office to be found, only bored-looking people behind a random row of travel vacation agencies were in the exit/check-in area.

I asked the first bored body at a “cheap vacations” desk if there was a car rental office and she said “go outside and go left”

I did. There was nothing. I saw people getting picked up by a lone taxi, trees in the distance, a parking lot, and nothing. Per my car reservation, it said the car place was in Baden Baden a mere 7 miles away. Easy peasy even if I had to take a taxi. But surely, they had a shuttle.

I was wrong.

I called the rental company for the assumed shuttle and they said “We will send someone” They never came.

I called again. The girl transferred me to someone who gave me driving directions to the rental office. I said how do I drive there since the whole reason I called was to get my rental car?  The girl declined to take notice of my statement and offered to email me driving directions instead. Ok, thanks for not listening and giving me stupid advice.

Make note to self: do a Google review and tell them maybe they should put their dumb advice on the rental agreement; “Must drive yourself to rental office for a rental car when you have no car.” Have a nice day. Idiota.

First hour lost from phone BS since arrival in this tiny tiny airport.

So according to the GPS there was a car rental office hidden in the back side of the tiny airport yet despite being a grown educated adult who has traveled the world, I couldn’t find it and no one seemed to know where it was either.

Luckily Jorge started walking to the end of the airport building outside as if he was going to look for a back alley or wander out to the tarmac. He was desperate to avoid my increasing aggravation and wanted to solve the problem.   He suddenly waves to me from a far corner near the building and a parking lot.  

He found it.

We walk into a dark area of the building and there was the Sixt rental desk.

So just like the rental person on the phone, she couldn’t help me. The lot was only for returning cars. I had to go to the office in Baden Baden. Take a bus to a train then you can walk from there she said. She failed to tell us the correct train station or that the office wasn’t in downtown Baden Baden it was someplace else.

But we happily complied with her directions to get on with it to save the taxi ride cost.  Unfortunately, we had already now lost two hours since stepping off the tiny plane in the tiny airport with no shuttle. But I thought whatever, we will be there soon.

We hopped on the bus in front of the place, and it ended up being a 40-minute ride to where? Nowhere near Baden Baden downtown. I’m thinking the city is 7 miles? 40 minutes on the bus? Wtf?

It took us to a train station which turned out was the wrong train station.  Nowhere near the rental agency. We then had to take the train to get to somewhere near the car rental place.

The train took another hour.

We arrived in what we thought was the city center. It was not. It was outside the city.

The rental car place was a 20-minute walk but in an industrial park in the middle of nowhere and one would have to cross a major highway to get there. We couldn’t walk there. In such a tiny place how is it every person gave us wrong information?

3.5 hours now gone since stepping off the tiny plane on the tiny tarmac at the tiny airport with no shuttle.

Ready to drink or scream, I said we had to take a taxi. I was at the end of my patience.  20 minutes later at 5 pm we arrived at the tiny rental agency in the middle of an industrial complex of buildings in the middle of nowhere.  The place was due to close in one hour and we lost almost five hours since landing to get less than 10 miles to the place. Five hours, let that sink in.  This is why I drink.

The total cost of bus, train and taxi? $50.   A simple taxi ride from the airport would have cost the same but done in less than an hour. I should have done my research or packed to-go wine in my purse.

Beware of saving money on buses and trains when one form of transportation is all you need.

Then to add insult to injury, the rental car agency had only an electric car for me. Wtf. Like where in the middle of the black forest would I plug it in?

Nowhere.

Good thing the guy didn’t hassle me about this, but I had to do what? Wait. He said he would find a car for me in this tiny place in the middle of nowhere.  So, we sat and I refused to look at my watch anymore.

Suddenly a young attractive woman walked in speaking German to the young man. They were smiling.  Turns our she was returning a nice BMW and wanted the electric car that they tried to give me.

He then said it was all mine with no charge for the upgrade.

He then set me up to return the car at the tiny airport with no shuttle so I wouldn’t have to pay a taxi or take any more busses or trains to get back.

Thank God for small favors.

We were off and went straight to our hotel in Baden Baden albite 6 hours later than planned.

It was quaint, in a small town 10 minutes from the main Baden Baden but the good news? It had a Biergarten.

Finally, a beer in Germany.

Just cause it’s tiny tiny doesn’t mean you won’t wait wait.

Moral of the story;

Take the damn taxi.

Never assume there’s a shuttle, and 10 miles maybe a 100.

Somewhere in Germany